EL’s Dribble

I’ve been needing a spiritual chiropractic adjustment these days. I used to go to a chiropractor friend who would give me weekly adjustments. Basically popping the “knuckle” of my spine and setting it more into place. I’m not sure if that’s the right scientific explanation – it just feels like he’s realigning it back to what it’s supposed to be.

As a chiropractic patient you assume that once you realign it you’re done. But the reality is that it needs constant realignment. And I’m finding that I need constant realignment. I’m reading through Leviticus – and you’d think it’d be boring. But it’s not – not at all.

There’s this heavy, sit-down-the-kids talk at the end about being obedient. Obedient to God’s commands. Trusting in what he says he will provide. And the gist is this – obey and live safely and abundantly. Disobey and live a life of torment.

When things are not going my way – I think I’m living a life of torment. When people don’t get it – meaning, they don’t understand what we’re doing, they are not embracing the simple things of Jesus and instead choose the complicated bondage of the world… I get frustrated. I get sad about it – but I also have to confess that I think it’s a reflection on me, my leadership, my capabilities. It’s then way more about me and less about people. And that’s crippling.

So God’s question for me this morning. Am I more about obeying or am I more about winning? Winning in the sense where I’m wanting to measure up to others and prove myself to the world… prove to all that I can do this. To give myself some credit… I wouldn’t say that that’s what I’m all about. But if I’m sober with myself too, it’s in me. And it adds undue stress, anxiety and worry to me.

God’s word for me this morning – keep it on… keep on doing what I called you to do – let me take care of the results, the winning, the outcome…

OK.

I was also encouraged by Hugh Halter’s blog… it’s just reassuring that someone else feels the same.